Lousy Monday!

I am in a cribby mood today..
Cribbing about how fat I look and how I dont have any good officewear shirts. And how I dont look good when I wear party tops also. And how the husband will never understand me because he never faced this problem. And how I will not even fit into the ones in the stores, because the losers in Hydie dont stack anything more than a 32" waist size! And how I hate myself today. And how I should buy more skirts, and no more jeans.
And how the husband is not trying to make me feel better coz he is silent, and how is not letting me just be when he spoke up.. I thought this is just plain PMS. And glad that finally I am PMSing. Or thought this is because of the mad bunch which refused to leave my home till 3AM last night, and the grumbling is because I had to be up till 4, and then wake up again by 7 for the maid!

But then the minute I reached office, I figured out the day is screwed up by itself.

The team started work and the regular bitch intruded into my work, leaving with nothing to do, and thus walking away with the credit of doing all the work! The same bitch then intrudes into something else I do, and proves its importance. Just when I was thinking that the mood cannot get any worser, the meeting the boss ass has to happen.. and that guy behaves like the perfect ass that he is!
And ticks me off in the wrong direction, just for the heck of it.
He proves to me that my decision to give our relationship a fair shot is totally wrong, and that I am wasting my time around him. I'd rather be looking at greener pastures, and get some piece of mind!

God! This day cannot get any worser!

Someone please tell me where I can get 34" Levi's jeans... :(.. I badly need them.
After having abstained from jeans shopping for the past 2 yrs, I dont want to buy anything lesser than a Levi's now, and I dont think those losers stock anything in that size.. atleast in Hydie!!! Aaargghhh... I hate this day!!!

What goes forth...

Okay.. so yday I come to know that the guy who almost screwed my career last year, got his screwed now!

And though I knew it was coming and somewhere in my mind, I knew he kinda deserved it. But I wasn't happy about it.
Glad that I am still preserving some amount of humanity in my mind...

Considering what I felt for him when that incident happened last year, I thought I would hate him forever.. but who would know how time would change, and I would come to actually realise that though he is a player, he is a tough one, and that I would respect that in him.
He went on to become a friend, and now almost a guide, but that is not why I felt bad for him today.

I know what that period means when you lose one year in your career, and the mental trauma one goes through in that period, and the amount of time one carries the scars.. I prayed then that no one ever goes through that again, knowing fully well that it would happen to some unsuspecting soul.
This guy knew it was coming to him, but people like me are screwed because someone else decided to do that, not because of what we did!

Whatever... I am just thankful to God for not making me a heartless bitch who would've laughed when such a news was relayed... Laughed and said - See.. what goes forth comes back!

No... I am not that bad yet!
Thankfully, this rat race hasnt taken a toll at my personality yet!

But I did notice one thing yday, the folks who harassed me at work(in whatever ways), all of them got it back in some way or the other. I am talking about the reasonless torture I was made to bear, not the regular fights or disagreements you would have with folks at work! And this made me believe in karmic cycle a bit.. not that I am happy about it too(atleast in some cases like this!)

Po! - The Kung Fu Panda

There is no charge for awesomeness and attractiveness!!

Awesome.. this is enough to have anyone in splits when they see the huge Po say this!

This is one of the best movies I have seen off late, of course on par with Dark Knight and Rock On!
But they are in a different league, and this one in its own league altogether! What a great movie! Such impressive show of technology, I must say!
And such a great exprerience watching it on IMAX screen.

I am in awe of the creators of the characters, and the animators. Its very tough to impart all the human emotions to the animation characters, and this movie is one excellent example that this is possible!

The jokes on Po's huge body, the pain Shifu feels when he see Tai Lung becoming evil, the special manner in which Oogway munches his teeth, Tigress' change in attitude, the baby Tigress' waiting for Shifu to pat her back, Viper's makeup, the secret to the Secret Ingredient soup, the tight security at the prison - all of them... every one of them is awesome, and greatly animated!

The whole concept of Dragon Warrior, the birth place of Kung Fu, the great hall of Kung Fu warriors, the Wuxi Finger Hold - I am in awe of all these things!

We should hang out! Agreed!
This is my second most fave dialogue from the movie!

And the moral of the story, or rather the main takeaway is so good that it can be applied to everything in life.

Believe in yourself. The secret to success is nothing, but you! Things become special only if you believe in them!

Two movies in one week, both talking about dreams, and belief in yourself.. I think its time I caught the hints Universe is throwing my way! :)

Rock On!

So I finally go and see Rock On! And boy, did I love it!

Farhan Akhtar looked great, but I loved the way, the other guys looked.
And I couldnt help but notice that the performances by Magik in the flashback scenes have been greatly inspired by the Doors and FA looked very much Jim Morrisson.

That apart, the best part of the movie is the importance the friends give to each other, and the subtly yet directly put fact that you are not happy if you dont live your dreams.
This movie is one of those movies that got me thinking in both the above areas, and thus left me wanting more of this movie, and life too.. :)

You cant call FA a great singer and an actor, but the boy did manage to do both of them.
And then, the lyrics in this movie are not what you call one of Javed Akhtar's best.
And I also felt that FA almost ghost directed this movie! There were so many traces of DCH in the movie, and his expressions were very much like Hrithik's in the movie, Lakshya.
I loved the hindi rock, and I think I am going to like husband's rock music collection now..
And I loved the song - Tum ho to!
Yes, Pichle saat din is a good song, but not great lyrics.. however the choreography of the Live version is simply out of the world. I could not stop dancing for that song in the theatre!:)

Above all this, this movie made me yearn for freedom.. freedom to do what I want to do, freedom to roam around aimlessly, freedom to pack bags and go to any place, freedom to live the life without any ties... It revoked the wanderlust in me!
It reminded me that I have so much more to explore in this life, and how much I hate responsibilities!
It reminded that time does not run out, but I still should not delay in going behind my dreams!

Sigh!

Doggie baby!

This morning I got to see a shot of Amigo, and felt a pang in my heart!
That yearning of having a dog for myself started all over again, and now I cannot stop it. I know I will get okay in a while or two, but then I ask myself - When? If not now, when will I ever have a dog?

I know that I cannot wait any longer to have one. I know that the doggie who would enter our lives would be very much loved, and the best thing to happen to us, but I am still not in a position to get one.
Call it shying away from responsibilities or being over practical, but a doggie is no where in my life atleast for the next 5-6 years.

I do not have it in me to take care of another human/living being, because that comes with a lot of responsibility. And having a dog is almost like having a kid, and I should teach him good habits, and make him a better dog.
I would love it if he gets our happy natures, but for that it requires me to spend time with him, which is what I dont have.
Its not right on my part to keep the small puppy to live by himself in the house when I go out and work. He obviously needs people around him, and he needs to see someone from whom he can learn to be a better doggie!

All this is the practical me speaking, but I do know that I need a pet at this point of time in my life. A pet is something which would make my life feel full and complete. A pet would make me a better person, teach me patience and how to let loose. It would surely make my life look a lot better!
And before that we are yet to decide if we will get a pug or a labbie baby! The husband is voting for a pug, and I cannot imagine anything but a labbie for a baby!
He thinks a pug is a symbol of joy, and suited for apartment living, and I think I cannot imagine having a pug for a pet, its too small.
These are too far-fledged discussions... For now, Azlan and Sirius will have to wait.

Bigg Boss ka ghar....

God ! Will that Rahul Mahajan guy ever go out of Bigg Boss? Not forgetting the fact that he is a sad case of a loser son for a winner Dad, he is so extremely irritating that the mere sight of him on the show is enough to put me off!
I hate the way he fusses around women, pokes his nose in every conversation happening around the house and thinks of himself as someone who has seen crap in life! Will someone tell him that whatever he saw is something which every average Indian son would have to see at some point in their lives - Dad's death. But what he did to himself with all those drugs is something which you dont call suffering!

And then, the woman Monica Bedi. Does she even know what she is talking? The way she halla-machafied and still did till the Aakhri Salam program. Woman, get a life! And get some vocabulary. You can scream all the time that your eviction was planned! You got out coz you were close that irritating fellow! Simple!

And now, looks like the calm Raja is the lambi-race-ka-ghoda. Ashutosh is not bad himself, and so is Zulfi. This time I am sure it is Sambhavna.

Whatever... I hope Rahul goes out soon.. I just cannot watch that show anymore with him showing off his dirty legs in the show! Did that guy ever go to a gym all his life? Yucks!!!

Love!

Yep, I was always right!
However beautiful, being in love makes any strong person dependent on the other person.
All that strength, resilience, patience, determination - none of these work when the person you love is in question.
Without knowing it, you attach all your dreams, hopes, happiness, smiles and existence to the other person... And by the time you realize it, you know you are too deep into it.

I know its not bad, but its not good either! Or so, my practical self says.. but the almost-non-existent-emotional-self says, its good..
Its good to have someone to wait for, someone to attach all those emotions to and someone to give them all back...
But then the practical-self knocks it off with one thought - what if this is not forever? What if fate shows its thumb in?
Aah.. here comes the emotional-self telling, its worthwhile to be in love, worthwhile to love with all the heart, rather than reserve those feelings. But then its also scared to be left alone in the middle of the desert and scared to be insecure...

Long back, I had decided that love is not for people like me, those who love themselves more than anything else, those who hold their needs above everyone else, and those who are self-sufficient with themselves.
Only later did I realize that when you are in love, 'I' means the other person too... His smile makes you smile, his success makes you feel successful and his absence makes you long for him!

Funny I should think like that, but this the way of life!
Or a typical Arien trait of touching the fire once the earlier burn fades off...

The practical-self, it knows I can still pull myself up again, and continue with life...
Only that the emotional-self knows that it will take a lot of time...
Thankfully, amidst all these, I have still retained the 'Me', whom I still love... :)

Whatever it is, its great when its there, and it gives this idle mind of 'Mine' something to think about, something to rave about and something to do about... - 'Us' :)